Even though she is gone….

i am still haunted by the things she did behind my back. i am losing it over my cell phone bill. she has not enough common sense or conscience to realize that she cannot take a phone that was given to her for contact with home and add 26 dollars worth of ring tones?
yes i am still in not so happy mood but, but damn! is there a way to cleanse my live of the irritation?

some people will say to pray. been there done that still doing that
some people recommend retail therapy. broke and jobless. plus i am paying for the bills she racked up while here.
some people say to let it go. check out my answer to retail therapy part three.

i still want to shake her parents.
i want to shake fate for dealing her such a blow.
i want to yell at the chromosomes in her body for jacking her up beyond what i can handle
i want to napalm the system. they let her down like no child should be let down.

wow! i guess i will have to stick to my same advice that i give to myself and VENT!

in time it will get better.
i pray.

goddess

Fuckwad…Fuckiedoodle…Homewrecking Ikea!

Cleaning this house is going to take a combination of Freecycle, a yard sale from Hades and some Zanax to get done! There is no way I am going to get this house cleaned with all that is in it. I am going to have to start tossing things.
Then I think to myself. What am I going to do with all my books? My lost socks? My clothes that don’t fit? my Time? My energy?
I am so sure that there will come a time in the future (whenever that may be) when I need those books for PowerPoint 2000, that they are still in my closet collecting dust.

*do you hear screeching car wheels?*

Well I sure as hell do and it is fine time this house gets a real tearing down.

That little lady on Poltergeist was wrong too so I make note to myself not to call on her. I don’t think she would be worth my money.

I came home today and stared and stared at my house.

Laundry in the living room. My work desk items packed from preparing for a strike blocking the patio door. My TV room is just a mess with nothing. It is neither messy, organized or orderly. I don’t have a word for that room.

My son’s room is full of his mess and I have committed myself to turning that over to his great-uncle for maintenance.

The spare bedroom just begs for attention, but I can’t get that far.

My bedroom is where I need to start. But do I want to strip it down to the bare walls and start over or just rearrange it.
Let me start by saying that I have rearranged this room at least 6 times in the past 4 years. Rearrangement is not working. The furniture is cool, but I have just too much stuff in there. I have not enough closet space and the clothes I try to squeeze in there I can’t squeeze into myself, so why do I continue to keep them around?

Shit!

I have a 3 day weekend and I am going to dig in. Just one room.
My bedroom.

Anyone up for a yard sale?

Anyone???

Goddess


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Exercising to get away from the kids? You Betcha!

More parenting videos on JuiceBoxJungle

I don’t have time to feel guilty for getting time to myself and away from my familial chaos. I find that when i have time away from the boy genius, I am more sane when he wants me to sit and play an hour of Star Wars on the Wii or Star Wars on the XBOX or just a friendly game of chess *smiles*
My thought is that he is just about to turn 8, and I had better do what I can to stay healthy and in shape as I am going to be doing this for the next 16 years (you don’t see your kids leaving home for good at 18 do you?).

Now that I have confessed, there is one exercise that I would love to get to do more often by myself and that is bike ride. I have a rack on my VW that can hold two bikes but I can’t seem to get myself to believe that it is okay to leave the boy and his bike at home for these riding escapades.

To me, it is like going to see a children’s movie with no children.
I am most sure some of you know how I am feeling.

I have to work on that
*makes note to self*
Goddess