Happy Mother’s day

Not a day goes by that I don’t sit and thank the heavens above for my little Milo. When i think about the difficult decisions that I had to go through to have him, I would never choose a different struggle. He attracts the hearts of many around him. He gives you all that he has inside and sometimes gives too much. I am thankful that he can do that. I can’t truly say that I taught him, I think he’s been doing for quite a few years. he’s got something of a been there, done that frame of mind and it helps to take the stress off his living. He is mine alone and belongs to the world as well.
I continue to dig this mother thing.
Happy mothers day to all the otha mothas!!!

Goddess

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Motherhood… How I love thee…

So here’s the story on Milo’s errant behavior. Milo decided to leave the house while I was taking a nap against my wishes. he and a “friend”went to a neighborhood home and got into a bit of mischief.
Milo and the neighbor kid down the street broke into an empty home and proceeded to light fires on the stove.
I know been there done that simple. kids. door unlocked. Break in. gas still on. lighting things on fire. fine. but no. that’s not how it went down in this case. the kid down the street decided that he would take a rock and pitch it through the glass sliding door!!!!
While the boys are inside lighting fires the guy who was cutting the grass. By the way, the house was not abandoned it was merely vacant; called the cops and the cops came out and busted the kids.
I got a call during my catechism class from J telling me the cops had the boy. What possesses children to do things like this is beyond me. However I had to remain calm and calm did I remain until I spoke to the ex-husband. He immediately launches into how good a father he is because he would NEVER EVER EVER allow something like this to happen while Milo was under his care.
Yeah I stayed calm and listened to his ranting as I prepared my class for a last minute sub who would take over. While I’m doing this, I get a call from the sheriff asking me if o could come pick up Milo because he did not feel safe releasing Milo to his father. Apparently the father of my child rolled up on the scene screaming and hollering about how he was going to “beat your fucking ass”. Not too bright sayeth the ex wife. The sheriff was bent out of shape over the idiotic entrance of my intrinsically asinine asshole former spouse….
To be continued

The Playpen: Prison for kids or Early Release for parents?

I’ll tell you what I think of play pens. They will keep your kids from getting kicked in the jaw during your Tae Kwon Do class but is there more than?
I don’t think so. I practiced my Martial Art at a school every morning at 10am and he needed to be held back a bit.
Once he got that look that he was going to hop out and kick my butt for keeping him in there, he got to come out. He did get hit maybe once or twice (never too hard) because you are also more aware of your child’s presence when you are required to be aware of their location and well being.
There are animal rights groups that are against crating your cats and dogs in the house. I don’t want a dog who gets out of a crate ever morning and tears through my house looking for something ‘new’ to destroy the moment I avert my eyes and I sure don’t want a kid who gets out of a play pen and does the same.

When I was a kid, we barely had car restraint systems. We could climb out of a crib or a high chair with the dexterity of a kangaroo at the kiddie play area at the local mall. There is no reason to hold the child still because they have a tendency to learn better if they are out and exploring in their environment. Children are meant to get out and explore all of their world. How else can they learn. Their parents get to touch everything? Why can’t they do they same within reason?
How many toys can you put into a playpen to keep a child interested? I say as few toys as possible.
I see some folks get to the park with the playpen in tow and a soccer ball bag full of toys!!!!! WTF????
Leave that behemoth at home, put on your shorts and running shoes and chase the children. That is why God gave them legs… to run their parents insane heading for the curb with traffic whizzing by at 40 mph.
I am sure that every parent remembers “that one time… when I had to smack little Jimmy on his bottom as I caught him from running out onto the expressway”…. let’s keep those learning moments for both children kept safe by their parents and parents safe in the knowledge that they can continue teaching from the heart and not from convenience.

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Lose it like you’re getting paid to do it!

I lose it sometimes, and I am proud.
That is not to say that I lose it for the sake of satisfaction of watching little children cower at my feet cringing at the very vibration of my soprano holler…

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I have come to realize that in order to make any attempt at raising well balanced, well rounded, self starting children who will be the adults helping you in and out of bed and on and off the bedpans in your old age, you gotta let them see your human side.
It is okay to lose your cool but you have to set the framework up for how you lose it and make sure your children are comfortable with the process.

I used to yell a great deal. Then, one day, I saw my precious child draw back at my noise level. At that point, I decided that I would stop yelling but I would not give up my release of getting angry and losing it from time to time. I think it is perfectly okay for children to see their parents half cocked and looking a bit crazy. Adds to the flavor of the food at dinnertime.

I had a friend in grade school who had parents that would crack me up when they got angry.Her mom would chew her tongue while scolding her.

Try it. I know you want to… 🙂

Her stepfather would point at her with his middle finger when he was scolding. It was extra hilarious to watch them both scolding her at the same time.

ah… childhood…

I am thankful to be growing up alongside a young man who sometimes loses it himself. When he has his moments, we can talk about it and how he feels because he knows that I understand because I have been there and he has been witness; willing and unwilling.

So my advice is to never be afraid to lose your cool in front of your children from time to time…

They will respect you for it.
And you will gain respect in a relationship that at times can make you want to flip your lid.

Goddess

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Take The Vow of NonViolence at itakethevow.com